Say What?

As writers, we don't want to write the way people really talk. Real speech is full of ums and ers, backtracking and repetition, and telling people things they already know. What we want to do is give the impression of how people really talk. So we make liberal use of sentence fragments and comma splices, idiomatic and clichéd phrases, as well as intentional misspellings that indicate region, ethnicity, or class.

Avoid drowning your dialogue in phrases such as exclaimed, murmured, shouted, whimpered, asserted, inquired, demanded, queried, thundered, whispered, and muttered. These words make it sound as if you have fallen in love with your thesaurus. In most cases, the word "said" works just fine, and using colourful tags detracts from the dialogue.

On the other hand, they can be effective when used sparingly and with due reflection. For example "he growled" can be safely used in a love scene to convey sexual desire without being inappropriately explicit. Equally, "snarled, hissed, or barked" can illustrate a personal characteristic or highlight an emotion that's essential to the plot.

One dialogue tag to avoid, "He ejaculated." At the very least, don't use it during a sex scene – unless you want a laugh. And don’t let your hero say something ‘cockily’ either. Laughter is the surest way to ruin the ambiance of a passionate love scene.

Watch the adverbs in your dialogue tags as well. If a character’s words are already angry, you don’t need to insert the word “angrily” after “she said.” However, adverbs come in handy when a reader may be confused about how the dialogue is said. For instance, if you write: “What are you doing here?” she asked. The reader doesn’t know whether she’s pleasantly surprised, upset, or angry. But if you write: “What are you doing here,” she asked angrily, the reader knows how she’s feeling.

Don’t just have your characters standing, or sitting, across from one another rambling on and on. Have them emphasize what they’re saying with their hands. Have them move around – sit down, stand up, pace. Be aware of their facial expression, especially the eyes. But watch out for eyes that “follow people around”. A gaze might do this, but eyes stay in a person’s skull, unless perhaps you’re writing a horror story.

Your characters are probably not going to be holding a conversation in a completely empty room. Have your character pick up a book, crumple a paper, put their fist through a wall. The items in a room can be fiddled with, gestured with, tapped – they put a static character in motion. Characters should never sit still unless the stillness is a device itself.

Dialogue should have a purpose. Most often that purpose is to relay important information, but it can also increase suspense, clarify what a character wants, strengthen (or weaken) their resolve, or even change their situation for better or worse. Above all, dialogue should move the story forward.

Show and Tell

Next to “write what you know”, the most popular piece of writing advice is “show, don’t tell.” But what do they mean by showing?

Showing is when you reveal things about your characters, the story world, relationships, etc., as you go about advancing your story. With telling, you stop the story in its tracks, kill whatever momentum you had going, and back up like a dump truck to dump a ton of information onto your reader.

Good writing should evoke sensation in the reader – don’t just say “it’s raining”, help the reader experience the storm. Involve the emotions. Take fear, for instance. Fear is a strong emotion with a great many ways to describe it - stomach in knots, breaking out in a sweat, quaking, shivering, uncertainty in the eyes, ducking in anticipation of a blow, a strong urge to run away. . .

Telling: She was afraid of the approaching storm.
Showing: She stared, frozen in place as lightning lit up the sky. Her heart sped up and she choked back a whimper, shivering as a breeze swept over her sweat dampened skin leaving goose flesh in its wake.

You want your reader invested in the character. You want the reader inside the action. That's the sign of good writing . . . to pull the reader out of his ordinary life and put him in the middle of someplace else.

Many writers resort to telling because they believe the reader won't get the point if they don't. Often writers tell, then show, to make sure they get their point across, in effect treating their readers like morons. But the truth is that when you take out the telling, the showing remains. And that's all the reader needs in most cases.

Fiction is all about forging an emotional link between the author and the reader. One of the best ways to do this is by creating vivid images that immerse readers in the world of the fiction — not merely telling readers what’s happening, but showing it to them.

You want to make your writing vivid enough to grab a reader’s attention and draw them into the story. Showing them is an important way to do this. To help you show instead of tell, keep in mind the following:

Avoid overusing adverbs. Instead, use strong, specific verbs.
Use the five senses.
Don’t simply name feelings, let you characters experience them.
Use expressive dialogue to show the characters’ emotions and outlook.
Generate emotion through vivid writing and characters’ reactions.
Use well-placed details to bring scenes to life.

Does this mean all telling is bad? Not at all, telling does have its place. Use it for:

Slowing things down – a story that’s non-stop action can be exhausting for the reader. Telling, through narrative summary, can give the reader a breather after an extended, action-filled scene. It also varies the story’s rhythm.

Condensing recurring action – once a scene has been shown and the reader knows what it consists of, it doesn’t need to be stretched out into further scenes. It can be summarized instead. You can also summarize minor scenes that are similar to a key scene that will take place later on.

Minor characters – if a character doesn’t warrant a full scene, needed information can be delivered without straying unnecessarily from the plot line.

Transition between scenes - a brief event can smooth the way between bits of action or character interaction, without leaving an illogical gap or a sudden, unintentional jump in time.

The mark of a good writer is the ability to use both showing and telling to their best advantage. A successful story is one that has a balance between the two, and only you, as the writer, can decide how much should be shown, and how much should be told.

The Voice of God

Active voice: Big Brother is watching you.
Passive voice: You are being watched by Big Brother
Active voice: They paved paradise and put up a parking lot.
Passive voice: Paradise was paved and a parking lot put up.

Active voice is the voice of power, action, and drive. It is the voice God speaks in. God didn't say, "Thy neighbour’s wife shall not be coveted by you." He said, "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife." If God wrote the Ten Commandments in the passive voice, they would sound more like the Ten Suggestions. When He writes in an active voice, you know He means business.

Active voice is usually clear, emphatic, and flowing. It is also direct. Readers prefer the active voice (whether they are aware of it or not), because it decreases the amount of mental work required for understanding the text. People naturally have a more positive reaction to active voice than they do to passive voice.

In the most basic active-voice construction is: subject – verb – direct object. The subject “acts” on a direct object. A verb is in the active voice when it expresses an action the subject performs.

I caught the fish.
You are making too much noise.
Judy plans to make tacos and watch DVDs tomorrow night
In each of these sentences, the subject (I, You and Judy) performs the action of the verb (caught, making, watch DVDs). The sentences are punchy, direct and make it clear who’s doing what.

Writing in the passive voice means creating sentences where the subject is “passive” – acted upon, rather than agents of action. In this case, sentences often become confusing or simply dull.

The fish was caught by me.
Too much noise is being made by you.
Tomorrow night, making tacos and watching DVDs will be done by Judy.
In each of these sentences, the subject (“the fish”, “too much noise”, “making tacos” and “watching DVDs”) is being acted upon by the verb. With sentences written in this way, we can even eliminate the agent who is performing this action:

The fish was caught.
Too much noise is being made.
Tomorrow evening, tacos will be made and DVDs will be watched.
These are all perfectly correct sentences, but the reader has the sense that something is missing. Who caught the fish? Who or what is making too much noise? And who’s going to make those tacos and watch those DVDs?

Take a piece of writing that you’ve produced, and go through it, checking to see if each sentence is in the active or the passive voice. One clue to look out for when searching for sentences in the passive voice is the use of “was”:
The promotion was welcomed . . .
The gift was received . . .
The horse was ridden . . .
Another clue is the use of “by” when referring to who did something:
The dinner was made by me . . .
The flowers were brought by John . . .
The car was driven by . . .

Once you’ve identified the passive sentences in your work, try rewriting them in the active voice. Does it make a difference? If you’ve found and changed a lot of sentences, read the piece from start to finish. Do you see an improvement? Compare the word count from the original and your revised version to see how many words you were able to cut.

Writing in the active voice rather than the passive voice gives your writing more life and more clarity. Use the active voice unless doing so makes a sentence awkward. Your writing will stand out, and your readers will perceive you as more energetic than if you had used passive voice. No matter what field you are in, active voice will improve your credibility because you are talking to the reader instead of at the reader.

What’s Your Point of View?

"Writers are gods. We get to create entire worlds, populate them, and even, as in some sort of novelistic Götterdämmerung, destroy them. Of course, writers can do this in any viewpoint, but omniscient point of view adds another layer to the process." ~ - Nancy Kress

Point of view (POV) is the perspective from which the story is presented, the way the author allows you to "see" and "hear" what's going on. It determines the amount and kind of information the reader will be given. It is the lens through which the reader can see the world of the novel they’re reading.

First Person POV

First person point of view is probably the most natural voice to use because you use it all the time in your everyday life. Whenever you tell somebody about something that happened to you, you use the "I" of the 1st person.

The advantage of this point of view is that you get to hear the thoughts of the narrator and see the world of the story through his or her eyes. However, as readers, we share all the limitations of the narrator. We can only see and hear what they experience.

The narrator of a first-person story is a character within the story and therefore limited in understanding. He or she might be an observer who happens to see the events of the story, a minor character in the action, or even a protagonist.

Second Person POV

Second person POV is the most difficult POV to write from and is seldom used. In this POV the author speaks directly to the reader using “you”. In essence, the author invents a fictional character and then invites the reader to become that character.

Here’s an illustration:
You are not the kind of guy who would be at a place like this at this time of the morning. But here you are, and you cannot say that the terrain is entirely unfamiliar, although the details are fuzzy. You are at a nightclub talking to a girl with a shaved head. ~ from Bright Lights, Big City by Jay McInerney.

The author who uses this POV has made a daring choice, probably with a specific purpose in mind. Second person POV is meant to draw the reader into the story, almost making the reader a participant in the action.

Third Person POV

Third-person point of view is that of an outsider looking through a window at the story. The author uses "he," "she," or "it” and is narrating the story. There are three types of third person POV: omniscient, limited omniscient, and dramatic.

In the omniscient POV the narrator can home-in on a scene and on the viewpoint character in particular, showing us the events through the character's eyes and letting us hear their thoughts. We are told everything about the story, including the thoughts and feelings of all the characters, and even information that none of the characters know.

In limited omniscient, we are told the thoughts and feelings of only one character (rarely more than two characters). We do not know what is in the minds of other characters.

With the dramatic POV, we are told only what happens and what is said; we do not know any thoughts or feelings of the characters. It is called "dramatic" because it includes the words and actions, just as though you were observing a play or film.

Epistolary POV

In epistolary novels, the entire story is told in the form of letters, written from one or more of the characters to other characters. Their greatest strength is the strong sense of realism that they create.

These days letters have unfortunately gone out of fashion - both in the real world and in fiction - but it is possible to put a modern twist on the concept by substituting e-mails, or even text messages for letters.

So Which POV Is Best?

Most fiction writing comes down to two choices for POV: first and third. The chances are that you could write two versions of a novel - one in first person, the other in third person - and both would turn out fine, just differently. I have even read novels using both points of view, but these were by well established authors.

If you’re not sure what POV to use, try them all. If it works, it works. And if it doesn't, you can always reshape it into a more traditional form later. The great thing about writing a novel is you can always change your mind.

Outlines and Pantsers and Plots, Oh My!

You’ve got your idea and your characters, now you’re ready to begin. But before you do, you should decide whether you’re a plotter or a pantser.

Some writers come up with their idea and simply sit down and start writing. They have no idea what’s going to happen until they write it. These writers, who write by the seat of their pants, are known as “Pantsers.”

Being a pantser allows you far greater creative expression. If you don’t know where the plot is going, then the reader won’t either, which can result in an exciting story. It’s more interesting to work on the story and you’re able to push through to the end easily.

The downside of being a pantser is revisions. Plot holes and inconsistencies are harder to fix because the bulk of the novel has already been written. Revisions can become tedious and problematic.

On the other side of the coin we have writers who outline, or plot, their entire novel before getting down to the serious business of writing. They have detailed character sketches and reams of notes and know exactly where the story is going – it’s right there in front of them on paper. These writers are called “Plotters.”

Because plotters write detailed outlines before fleshing out their writing, they can often catch, and correct, inconsistencies and plot holes before they start writing. It’s certainly easier to make changes to an outline than to the finished novel. Many plotters depend on the outline to control the pacing, action, and suspense of their story. Scenes can be switched, or added, or deleted with ease. Another benefit is the outline can be used to help write the synopsis when the novel is finished.

The downside of being a plotter is that it can hamper the creativity and enjoyment of writing. The middle of the novel can bring on a decrease of motivation. You can start to lose interest because there’s nothing surprising about it. Being restricted by a specific series of events can be intimidating.

An outline is basically a blueprint of what’s going to happen in your story. For plotters, there are many methods of outlining to choose from.

Point-Form – Write down a point form list of everything you want to have happen in your novel. Once you’ve finished, go through and assign a priority number so you know what order they should be in.

Index Cards – Colour coded index cards are a great way to keep track of your characters and what their motivations are. Jot down brief descriptions of your scenes and keep adding cards until you can’t think of any more. Organize your cards in the order you want the scenes to occur in.

Post-It – Write your scenes on Post-It Notes and stick them to a piece of Bristol board or even your wall. You can change the order, add, or remove them. Colour code them so that each kind of scene has a different colour. This way you’ll know at a glance if you have too much or too little action, description, or suspense.

Spreadsheets – A spreadsheet can hold a vast amount of information. You can list all your characters and their information; make notes about plot points; and move scenes around with ease. If you want to use a lot of detail, you can even do a spreadsheet for each chapter.

“W” Folder – For this you need a file folder and a pen. Open the folder up and write a giant W on it, with one V on each side of the fold. Your story starts at the top of the first V and your initial crisis at the bottom. The middle point is where some of the problems may be resolved. The bottom of the second V is where the darkest crisis takes place and the top of the last leg is the resolution. Notes and other scenes can be penciled in between.

For more information, try checking out one of these links:

The Snowflake method
Writer's Digest Novel Idea Summary Sheet
Novel Outlining 101, by Lynn Viehl
Plot Diagram
Outline Your Novel in 30 Minutes

The Importance of Character

No matter how good your story idea might be, you’re not going to get very far without a character, preferably a strong one (maybe more), to implement it. What’s interesting in a story is only interesting because we care about the characters and what happens to them. We want to follow their lives as events unfold.

I try to build a full personality for each of our cartoon characters - to make them personalities. ~ Walt Disney

A flat, or two-dimensional character is defined by a single quality without much individualizing detail. A round character is a complex individual that is not easily defined. It is the flat character whom you must avoid at all costs.

When writing a novel a writer should create living people; people not characters. A character is a caricature. ~ Ernest Hemingway

Characters’ lives, just like our own, are multi-facetted with a wealth of detail. You, as the writer, must select the details that reveal the greatest possible information about the character, and details that have the greatest possible connection between the characters’ lives and the readers’.

Every human being has hundreds of separate people living under his skin. The talent of a writer is his ability to give them their separate names, identities, personalities and have them relate to other characters living with him. ~ Mel Brooks

It is the connection the reader feels with the characters in your story that is going to keep them reading. They need to know what happens next. They need to care about what happens to your characters.

If you will practice being fictional for a while, you will understand that fictional characters are sometimes more real than people with bodies and heartbeats. ~ Richard Bach

Place your character on a path with something at stake, with something to do, to achieve, to learn and to change. Put obstacles in his path to make the journey interesting. These obstacles could be physical or they might be psychological. He not only needs a goal, he needs something that might prevent him from attaining that goal.

I have found it easier to identify with the characters who verge upon hysteria, who were frightened of life, who were desperate to reach out to another person. But these seemingly fragile people are the strong people really. ~ Tennessee Williams

I’ll let you in on a secret, readers love a vulnerable hero who must overcome his own weaknesses and temptations, and come to realize that they’re sorry, they’re penitent, they’re full of remorse, at least in the context of the story at hand. This is something the reader can empathize with. We’re all human, we’ve all been there.

I start drawing, and eventually the characters involve themselves in a situation. Then in the end, I go back and try to cut out most of the preachments. ~ Theodor Geisel

It is the writer’s manipulation of reader empathy, rather than the nature of faults and gold stars, that results in effective character dynamics that infuse the story with stakes and vicarious emotion.

The more gifted and talkative one's characters are, the greater the chances of their resembling the author in tone or tint of mind. ~ Vladimir Nabokov


Characterization series, from StoryFix
How to Create a Character, by Holly Lisle
Creating Fictional Characters, from Novel-Writing-Help

If I Could Save Time in a Bottle . . .

Last week we explored where to find ideas to jump-start your writing, now we need to find the time to write. Time is limited, and for most people, the demands on their time are unlimited. Even when there’s not a day job, there’s still friends and family and numerous other obligations vying for your attention.

If you have a lot of demands on your time, it’s actually helpful to establish a regular time each day to write. Get up early and write before anyone else is up, take a notepad with you to lunch, or stop off at a coffee shop on your way home from work. Students often have time on their hands between classes. Stay-at-home parents can write during nap time. Your schedule may evolve as your life changes, but most people get more done if they have a regular writing time.

Find the best time of day for you to write. It’s a combination of when you are most alert and when you have free time. Pick that time and write. Shut off distractions. Don’t answer the phone, don’t come to the door. For as little or as much time as you are writing, do only that.

Take a look at your life and see where all your time is going. Cut back on some of the less important tasks or, if you have a family, start delegating. Watch two hours of TV instead of four. Go out twice a week instead of every night. Decide that you aren’t going to bring your work home. Make some sacrifices. Decide that your writing is worth it.

Most people don’t make writing a high enough priority. They intend to write, but end up running errands or whatever. These activities are nothing more than excuses not to write. Turn that around. Make writing an excuse not to do other things.

While it’s important to write every day, don't let yourself become obsessed in the beginning, especially if you’re the kind of person who tends to throw themselves into new projects only have their interest wane after a few weeks. Write for your hour or two and then continue with your daily routine. Remember that you're in it for the long haul. Your mind needs time to replenish itself so don’t be afraid to take the occasional break .

Support yourself in as many ways as possible. Writing isn’t easy. Books on writing can help, as does having a specific place to write. Join a writer’s group or on-line writer’s community. Associating with a few people who share your interests and struggles helps motivate and sustain you.

Writing is not for everyone. You may want to write, but maybe the desire isn’t enough to keep you from doing more entertaining or pressing activities. If you keep trying, and failing, to make the time to write, then maybe writing’s not for you. Don’t feel guilty about letting it go, perhaps it will become more meaningful to you at another point in your life. When it is important enough to you to make some sacrifices, you’ll be able to make them. Until then, adjust to the fact that writing is something you like, but not necessarily enough to be a writer.

Finding Time to Write, by Moira Allen
Finding Time to Write, by Martha Retallick
Five Tips for Finding Writing Time, by Michael Stelzner
Finding the Time to Write, by Sahag Gureghian
Finding Time to Write